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A world with no new films (scary?)

Vincent White

almost 2 years ago

I was watching 28 days later yesterday and I heard something that sent me into a spiralling anxiety, I was forced to imagine a world where no new films were made. Forget the prospect of being eaten or turned by zombies, that is a minor inconvenience in comparison. Imagine never seeing a new film, checking on MUBI and having nothing new to talk about other than what’s gone before (that is assuming MUBI and it’s faithful users survive a zombie holocaust). Of course the back catalogue of cinemas greatest would keep you entertained for the rest of your life, no doubt, but I fear for a future where we can no longer say “did you see wong kar wai’s latest attempt to rekindle his greatness?”

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

I’ve actually considered this in my own preparations for the zombie apocalypse. You’d be able to take books with you, of course, but even portable DVD players would run out of juice after a couple of films.

It’s just too horrible to consider, really. So would you stop it, please?

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

Heh yeah, depressing as hell … perhaps that IS the “cinephile’s” hell? Even worse, having every film to choose from and yet no electricity to watch them.

Lona

almost 2 years ago

I, too, have given the zombie apocalypse some thought (probably way more than is normal) and have come to the conclusion that I will submit myself to the zombie virus… then I can come after all of you and just put you out of your misery. Isn’t that nice? :)

Patapon

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

zombie apocalypse?…bring it on! (Ive read the survival guide…)

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

I’ve read the Survival Guide and World War Z, so I’m ready. But I want my mevies.

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

@Lona: In that case, I want to be “zombied” first. Thanks.

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

Sekzee and I will see you guys coming a mile away. You can shuffle toward the sound of the generator fueling the world’s last theater.

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

Aw man, it’ll be Demons all over again.

Lona

almost 2 years ago

I’ve played Humans vs Zombies… the ultimate preparation! muahaha
Although, I mean, if you’ve already got the generator going… zombies can like movies too, right?

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

But all they like are Barbara Streisand movies and it always ends in a bloodbath.

Lona

almost 2 years ago

That’s pretty unfortunate. I think you just redefined the severity of zombie virus.

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

It’s bad, man.

brady qw

almost 2 years ago

I wouldn’t wish a Barbra Streisand movie on anyone.

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

I felt like a zombie once after sitting through Funny Lady.

Jimmy B.

almost 2 years ago

With my game plan for the zombie apocalypse, if all goes according to plan, I won’t be able to access films to start with- which is a living hell, but it’s better than being a zombie.

I don’t like thinking about this.

Patapon

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

this makes me want to go play Resident Evil! I think I might…

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

I think zombies would be offended by the Resident Evil films … misrepresentin’. Just sayin’. Good games though. I don’t care what anybody says, the fifth one was pretty interesting the first time through.

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

Depends. Are real zombies more like:

A. Classic Romero Zombies: slow but persistent; well-versed in social commentary
B. Revisionist Zach Snyder Zombies: fast but shallow; easily distracted by editing

Patapon

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

Resident Evil 5 was ok. 2, 3 and 4 are great but Resident Evil: Zero and Resident Evil 1 for the gamecube are incredible

JR, I think Boyle reenvisioned the fast zombies ;)

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

The poet in me says A, but the kid in me says B. Who would be controlling the editing for option B though? God? Nature? The Queen Zombie? So many possibilities …

Wouldn’t be ironic if Zack Snyder attacked Romero as a zombie? Epic too.

EDIT: Oh yeah, I forgot about RE Zero – great one.

Lona

almost 2 years ago

Rage virus zombies > undead zombies

Patapon

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

I agree with Lona if we are talking about the scare factor.

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

Actually, Return of the Living Dead zombies > Rage Virus zombies, because they can speak and use communication devices.

“Send more cops.”

deckard croix

almost 2 years ago

Heh, I like that better. Dan O’ Bannon zombies! That film really scared the hell outta me when I was a kid. I totally didn’t get the humour until mid-teens.

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

One of the funniest horror movies. Great addition to the Z-canon.

NIGHTSH​IFT

almost 2 years ago

In a world infested by zombies, at least us lads wouldn’t have to worry about getting dragged to see the latest chick flick- or any exasperating tearjerker based on a novel by that Nicholas Sparks dude.

Lona

almost 2 years ago

I resent the implication that I enjoy any of those things…

Samanth​a

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

^ That.

House of Leaves

-moderator-
almost 2 years ago

^ That. Must needs keep in mind that very cool ladies are among us.