MUBI brings you a great new film every day.  Start your 7-day free trial today!
Watch a new film every day for $4.99.
Try MUBI for FREE.
 
All Topics  »

Lines from films you've always wanted to say in real life but never got the chance.

liam allen is slightly depressed

over 2 years ago

!!

Turner S

over 2 years ago

“You can’t piss on hospitality, and I won’t allow it!”

My friends know me as the guy that always quotes movies they’ve never seen/heard of and then scold them for not getting the reference.

Santrop​ez

over 2 years ago

Garbage day!

Unfortunately I don’t have any idea of where and when may I use that line but this thread :/

Frank P. Tomasul​o, Ph.D.

over 2 years ago

I HAVE used one line from a film fairly frequently, because the situation (or something like it) turns up often in real life.

I run through the house or office, holding aloft a thick book, and shouting, “The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here!

(Sometimes, it’s the new Academic Guidelines or the new Institutional Strategic Plan.)

Most MUBI readers will recognize my allusion to THE JERK (1979) with Steve Martin.

Claus Harding

over 2 years ago

If I ever came across someone who was depressed and who actually would say this line “I’d like to be alone”, my answer would be: “I understand… I’ll come with you.”

I don’t remember the film (maybe “Cocktail”?) but that combo always struck me as wonderfully absurd.

cato de tiquici​a

over 2 years ago

The Bride: You “overreacted”? Is that your explanation?
Bill: I didn’t say I was going to explain myself. I said I was going to tell you the truth."

The Bride: You and I have unfinished business.
Bill: Baby, you ain’t kidding.

i know it’s not much, but it would definitely be cool to slip these babies into any conversation…ain’t it so?

Rich Uncle Skeleton

over 2 years ago

“Fuck you, Cowboy! Fuck all you assholes!” — Full Metal Jacket

“Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you—you’re cool—and fuck you! I’m out.” — Half Baked

Mary

over 2 years ago

yeah that half baked scene has got to be one of my favorites!

Salem Kapsask​i

over 2 years ago

Get out of my chambers, lesbians! -Queen Carlotta

Savanna​h

over 2 years ago

“MULTIPASS.”

I will die happy.

Roscoe

over 2 years ago

“If I wanted to have a conversation with a cunt, I’d have gone to the Have A Conversation With A Cunt Shop.”

Malcolm Tent

over 2 years ago

Ash: “Honey…..you got REAL ugly.”

Army Of Darkness

Malcolm Tent

over 2 years ago

Malcolm Tent

over 2 years ago

pretty much everything from that movie

Roscoe

over 2 years ago

“Cocaine or cards?”

spartac​ula

over 2 years ago

“My worst orgasim was right on the money” – Woody Allen

deckard croix

over 2 years ago

“The blood of these whores is killing me!” – Blood for Dracula

Filmstr​ess

over 2 years ago

“I’ll remember you honey, you’re the one that got away.”

Ryan Estabro​oks

over 2 years ago

“Suck my cock, I’ll murder your family!” – Will Ferrell (Semi-Pro)

spartac​ula

over 2 years ago

“Yute? Did you say yute? What’s a yute?” [MY COUSIN VINNY]

Mike Spence

over 2 years ago

TV:

“Ain’t no nostalgia to this shit here! There’s just the street, and the game and what happens here today.” – Cheese, The Wire

Isiah Donte' Lee

over 2 years ago

“How the fuck you get fired on your day off” – Friday

555-

over 2 years ago

“Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here. This is the War Room!”

Mark

over 2 years ago

“I’m gonna get that gun of mine and I’m gonna change you from a rooster to a hen with one shot!” – Dolly Parton, “9 to 5”

kndy

over 2 years ago

Each time I had a woman in my life (during my single years) and I have aways wanted to say “You complete me” (ala Jerry Maguire) because it sounded so cool in the movie….but somehow have found myself saying “you piss me off” much easier. But I figured why say it, when I can look in the mirror and see my reflection and think those words aloud to myself.

Kidding.

pjjrfan

over 2 years ago

I’m a custodian at an elementary school and I constantly bombard the staff and the students with one liners from movies. The kids love “I’m melting, melting.” The adults don’t always get it, but a lot do. although not a quote I use the up the downstaircase line everytime I go up the down stair case in my school, it annoys my administrators but the kids and teachers crack up everytime.

spartac​ula

over 2 years ago

“You had me at get lost” – Shallow Hal

the corduro​y suit

over 2 years ago

Blue Velvet:

Do you want me to pour it Frank?
Frank Booth: No I want you to fuck it. Shit, yes, pour the fuckin’ beer!

Oddly Dreamli​ke

over 2 years ago

“HEY Stella! Hey STELLLLAAAA!” I have to meet a stella first, and one who won’t hate me for that though..

Aaaawww, Seleana, that reminds me, I have a hilarious habit of spinning around in circles, looking skyward and saying in a girly voice “Miranda! Miranda!” whenever I meet someone named Miranda.

I saw a policewoman named Miranda just last week. I didn’t do it…I didn’t fancy getting maced for it.

(Still, I once said to a gorgeous looking policewoman “You’re too beautiful to be a police officer!” So I’ve been known to push my luck with ladies in blue. She just smiled, by the way—yes, I’m charming like that).

The funniest part about the Miranda reference? I don’t even LIKE the film in question!

(It is, of course, a reference to Peter Weir’s “Picnic At Hanging Rock”).

Oh, by the way, I also find it funny there’s a police officer named “Miranda” (As in the Miranda Act: You have the right to remain silent, et cetera).