More like Paul Thomas Blanderson.
Now you go.
did this really warrent an actual thread?
There are like 20 threads about this. Efe is gonna fuck you up.
…more like Alfred Bitchcock.
More like Citizen Can’t
More like Stanley Poo’lick…
More like Martin ScorGAYse
First Fahrenheit 9/11. Now this.
Michael Less, please.
More like George Fuckas
more like Francis Ford Dope-ola
More like Gay Maddin
More like Didley Squat
More like Ben Grimington
Now it’s personal.
More like We’reNOTascool.
More like Takashi FREAK-ay.
More like Edgar WRONG.
More like SCARIN’ Ourhandsoff-ski.
It took me a minute but I don’t think there is anyway anyone can beat this. Close the thread.
Gus Van Can’t.
I SAID THE THREAD WAS CLOSED.
this is so hilarious I literally pissed in my pants. fucking children
more like Robert BOREson
Stanley Rubrick’s Cube Kubrick
Rainer von METHbinder
Really, guys? I mean, cute and everything … but, really, guys? :D
He’s not from Europe. It’s only natural that pseudo-film critics don’t like PTA.
Lars Von Sneer
more like Jacques Potty
more like Jean Cameltoe
more like Lars von Ulrich
“He’s not from Europe. It’s only natural that pseudo-film critics don’t like PTA.”
No, it’s only natural because PTA’s films are boring.
Magnolia & There Will Be Blood could be described as boring. But Punch Drunk Love & Boogie Nights?
I don’t mean boring like “Nothing is happening! SO SLOW!” I mean find all his tricks and games boring.
The 9 intertwining stories in Magnolia seemed very silly in the way they all tried to converge with some goofy “moral” in the end- and there was a sing along that didn’t work in any conceivable way. Too self consciously hip to mean anything. It was a movie that WANTED to BADLY to mean SOMETHING and have some sort of humanitarian message, that it drained itself of any kind of tragedy or ambiguity. So by the end, it was completed deflated and a big waste of time. THAT’S what’s boring about it.
There Will Be Blood had very good atmosphere and I admired the framing and cinematography immensely, and I liked that he let the film unfold and meander and swim in its own stew without going “SEE, THIS IS WHAT THE MOVIES ABOUT, CATHARSIS!” But I got a chance to watch a bit of it recently and now I just find DD Lewis’s performance SO distracting. It doesn’t hold up. It’s a comic-booky, cartoony character at best, with a dumb voice. It’s actually really really funny.
Boogie Nights wanted to be Martin Scorsese SOOOO bad.
Punch-Drunk Love was cute. It was like all the bad things about Magnolia, but on overdrive.
Hard Eight was his best film. It wasn’t a masterpiece in any way, but thank god he cast Philip Baker Hall in the lead- he’s the kind of understated character actor that can calmly lead a film instead of a causing a big distraction. There wasn’t anything incredibly profound about it, but had I seen that film first, at the time PTA came onto the scene, I would have definitely had much more hope for him than what turned out. He showed a little more promise with There Will Be Blood, if he can keep that restraint he showed and create some atmosphere, and choose the RIGHT actors that won’t go off the deep end, I think he can eventually become a meaningful director. But he’s one of these guys that’s too much a fan of cinema in the most shallow way, he has to stop worrying about references to other films and silly shit like that.
And anyway, I wasn’t really making this thread to criticize him, I was making it to come up with ridiculous director names riffing on real directors. PolarisDiB clearly won, so there’s no point anymore.
better than any Scorsese movie I’ve seen.
OK i’m done.