Watching the entire David Lynch filmography and Donnie Darko, while a 14-year-old kid sits next to me and explains all of the “nuances” to me. It pains me to even think about it.
John Ford’s Westerns
Budd Boetticher’s Westerns
Preston Sturges’ Screwball Comedies
Vincente Minnelli’s Musicals
^ agree with 1,2, and 4
Censored Horror Films DVD’s with all the good stuff missing.
The mysoginistic and deceitful crap Judd Apatow and co keep bringing out.
Pixar Movies, especially Toy Story.
Haneke
E.T., Free Willie, Where the Wild things are….
Angelopoulos
I also second Donnie Darko.
CITIZEN KANE
If ever we needed that little boy who gazes at the Emperor, this would be it. After the clever cinematic tropes are accounted for, this film has huge stretches……….of essentially unwatchable cinema.
And like Grey Daisies, just above, there are also a few movie musicals from the 1940’s and 1950’s that now appear saccharine, belabored, simplistic, maudlin and tedious. Hell, they even appeared so when I was forced to sit through them in that late-1960’s. Things like:
MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS
GIGI
Also:
SPACEBALLS
THE PRINCESS BRIDE
BLAZING SADDLES
STAR WARS
YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN
AIRPLANE!
When people start quoting these last six movies, or impersonating the characters, or singing the songs, I want the floor to open up and swallow me.
Ouch at some of the stuff people are mentioning :(
“Ouch at some of the stuff people are mentioning :(” Agreed.
Lerner/Lowe musicals
Disney Pixar
anything by James Cameron
pretentious foreign bullshit
sci-fi
Forest Gump
A Baz Luhrmann film festival
An Edward Burns film festival
A Danny Boyle retrospective, or Aronofsky. That’d be tough
a Vincente Minnelli film festival. (nice to see I am not alone in this…)
most things Pixar. (or this.)
anything by Kevin Smith
having to sit through Slumdog Millionaire again.
anything starring John Wayne.
Earnest Captain Obviouses with their oh so deep insights into film.
Interesting. Watching and rewatching Pixar movies on a loop for eternity would be heaven for me.
But I guess it would be hell for people with no souls, so I think we’ve just stumbled upon the perfect formula for cinematic afterlife: a giant screen plays solely Pixar movies, and the good and righteous enjoy themselves while the horrible gnash their teeth.
Somebody contact God. He’s got to hear this.
—PolarisDiB
Polaris, you’re a genius.
For me, it’s Luhrmann’s oeuvre and The Boondock Saints.
AVATAR was movie hell for me.
The words Guy and Ritchie spring to mind, also and film that has a title that begins with the words Carry On makes me want to kill everyone involved.
Any special effects-based-movie would be enough to kill me through my eyes. Anything else but The angel on my right is fine.
‘very unbalance movies’ in…….
lack of details + obsession of high speed + empty vision or idea = “what the hell??? this is not a movie…”
‘light movie’
‘soft-funny’
’it’s just movie’-——— this is meaningless justify
I haven’t seen the Twilight films or Sex and the City, but I imagine those are close to the worst things on earth.
any movies by ron howard (satan’s right hand man)
Listening to Bruce Willis talk tough
most romantic comedies
Michael Bay
Back-to-back filmographies of movies featuring Jake Gyllenhall, Tobey McGuire, Zach Braff, Michael Cera, and Steve Carell.
Hell? A romantic comedy love triangle starring Matthew McConaughey, Kate Hudson and Jennifer Aniston. It’s funny because that actually could happen… stay tuned.
M. Night Shyalaman’s The Last Airbender… nonstop…
spending a week torrenting some obscure 1970s european art house movie that you had to torrent twice cause the first file was curropt then hunt down a english sub file seperatly only to finally watch the movie and relaize within 15 minutes that it is a peice of crap.
HENRY JAGLOM RETROSPECTIVE!
kevin smith’s Too Fat for Forty.
Wayne Rockmore
I Spit on Your Grave, Boondock Saints, and Fight Club!