Thanks to all posters and to Edouard for correcting my obvious faux pas for the topic title (which has been bugging me, as did the typos on other topics I started) and stating it should, of course, be WORST Movie Ever. What a variance in picks, but bad is bad, let’s face it. Keep it up, as I am building my must see list of baddies for a couple of nights filled with these obvious groaners.
“I agree with Justin,
i could never watch a Jean Claude Van Damme movie!!!”
You’re so wrong ! You’ll miss one of the most experimental action flicks ever : Knock Off (1998) by Tsui Hark, a kind of reahersal before his furious Time & Tide. Each shot of it is pure invention.You can think whatever you want about Van Damme but he had the flair to work with directors such as John Woo, Ringo Lam or Johnny To before they got known outside of Asia (excluding HK flicks addicts of course).
Sorry about my english that may sound strange, I’m French ;)
In fact I hate this kind of thread that only shows despise for people who like the movies which are quoted. There are so many good films to talk about, why waste time on bashing crappy flicks ?
Olivier-Actually JCVD is a pretty good movie too plus I kinda like Hard Target directed by John Woo-not a great film but entertaining. Steven Seagal is much worse than Van Damme.
“Friday Night Shitty Lights”. And anyone who liked this movie should die. I hate it with a burning passion of 1000 red flaming suns.
In the words of Keanu Reeves: “Whoa!”
The Doom Generation
Salo. That film’s not important. It’s just trash.
People love this thread because they love to hate. HATE! HATE! HATE! Come on, let’s hear some really good ones, er, I mean, bad ones!
What was that God awful goofy language that those silly vampire clowns were speaking in “30 Days of Night”? What a dreadful movie! bleh
I love the movie I picked, I thought this thread was going to be about movies that are so bad they’re good, but I guess these things always degenerate into people whining about how “I can’t understand how anybody can like this movie, it’s like so bad, omg, wtf, lol!!!!!1111111”
And there is always the sociopath who shows up who wants people to die for liking a movie they don’t.
Anyway, The Brain That Wouldn’t Die is pure nonsensical movie magic where the plot makes so little sense that I think the writers gave up half way through. Even during the end credits the title of the movie changes to The Head That Wouldn’t Die, the writers even forgot the name of the freakin’ thing!
Actually, without a doubt, Nic Roeg’s ‘Puffball’. He did his Q&A before the screening and promptly fled, which may have been a sign. I had to get out of there after an hour and a half, it dragged on for a while after that. Really could not believe how bad this film was. Wouldbe glad to hear from anyone else who saw this.
Why did someone say Evil Dead 2? :|
I am sick and tired of these ^*&$% snakes on this #$^#% plane!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So great it can’t suck. It would like to, but it can’t. That movie could have used some (a) dwarves, (b) Nazis, and © drag queens; each of whom would have gotten a musical number. Then it would have really been a masterpiece.
Speaking of dwarves – I mean little people – track down Under The Rainbow. Stars Chevy Chase, and a bunch of dwarves. Setting? Chevy’s a private eye or something manly like that, staying in the hotel across the street from the sets for Wizard Of Oz, while Wizard Of Oz is being filmed – yeah, it’s a period piece. The dwarves do lots and lots and lots of very hard partying throughout – everyone in this flick seems to be under the influence of something, and this seems to be getting in the way of whatever Chevy is trying to investigate – I can’t remember, at this late date, and neither can he I would bet. The worst movie. Even by Chevy’s standards it’s jawdropping. Criterion should release it – 3 discs, commentary, stills, dwarf recollections, the works.
And now that Chevy has come up in discussion, there is Modern Problems. Chevy is an air traffic controller with woman problems. Dabney Coleman is a sleazy pop psychologist. They feud over Beverly D’Angelo (I think – I ain’t looking it up). Chevy gets the upper hand after being bathed in radioactive toxic waste, which gives him psychokinesis, enabling him to levitate, snort huge quantities of voodoo powder dropped in the floor by Nell Carter, and give Beverly a massive orgasm by concentrating. Meanwhile, Dabney attempts suicide because Beverly (we’ll assume it is Beverly) won’t put out. There is lightning involved, and the century’s worst nosebleed. Theme song by The Tubes, followed by orchestral variations.
I’ll stop now.
If someone does like “Friday Night Shitty Lights” they should be taken through the same process that cows are in the beef packing plants and packaged as spoiled meat. Is that a bit on the sociopath side for ya?
Don’t hate because you liked the shittiest movie ever. Reliving the glory days of Uncle Rico and Wooderson are ya? Let me guess…“Varsity Blues” was the pinnacle of cinema? Blow.
“Robot Monster” is the absolute “Citizen Kane” of bad movies. The usual criteria for most beloved bad films is that they start off ridiculous and get tedious as the movie goes on. Not “Robot Monster”. This actually gets MORE ridiculous as the movie goes on – and that, fellow film geeks, is no easy feat. You don’t have to be zonked to enjoy this absolutely breathtaking endeavor. Go ahead and rent it and see if I’m right………
“Salo. That film’s not important. It’s just trash.”
hahahahaha
ah… Why do you think it’s trash? I mean I love your brutal 8 word Pasolini slaughter but I’m always curious why people reject the film with such vehemence.
Leaving out anything that wouldn’t even be considered an “actual” movie (i.e. Kung Fu Mummy), here are a few in recent memory that were unbearable:
Southland Tales just made me angry.
August Rush
In the Cut
While She Was Out (I designed the Myspace page for this one… shhhhh.)
JP I almost watched The Brain That Wouldn’t Die last night with a friend, but we got down to business and thought it would be more appropriate to watch the oh so terrible “Killer Bud”.
All I know is that Van Damme made one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen, I think it was called Cyborg.
I would whole-heartedly say The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996) with Val Kilmer, Marlon Brando, and Ron Perlman. I’ve never felt sick after a movie as much as I have with this one.
Ah talking of Brando, ‘The Brave’ was AWFUL!
Michael Bay’s Transformers…..
I’m sure no one ever heard of it, but no other movie ever made will ever be as BAD as…Mexican Blow.
Everything about this movie is BAD: acting, directing, cinematography, special effects, writing…everything!
The best thing about this movie is that it looks like it was made to be a bad b-movie, but it wasn’t! I actually spoke to one of the producers of this film, and he truly set out to make a great “Hollywood action” movie and really believes he achieved that. So bad it will make you laugh your a$$ off for about fifteen minutes, then it just annoys you. It takes bad movies to another level, even for b-movie genre!
Star Wars. Worst film ever made. Not only moronic and wretched, but it instigated a sea change and decline in American filmmaking which peersists to this day. Talk about dumb and dumber!
Star Wars. Worst film ever made. Not only moronic and wretched, but it instigated a sea change and decline in American filmmaking which peersists to this day. Talk about dumb and dumber!
Dr. Zhivago.While I was watching this monstrosity my feet went to sleep. I envied them.
Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood.
I thought it was fucking hilarious though.
Bob—- specify on the Star Wars comment.
The new shit is an abomination, but you can’t touch the the original trilogy.
Judy:
Apparently you can touch it. Mr. Lucas has proven so many times. Someone needs to tie his hands from touching it more.
Battle royale is far from the worst movie ever made, Raysquirrel.
Southland tales gets my recent vote, as well as Davinci Code.
Sacredchao, does a movie have to be unpleasant to be worst? not all movies are pleasant, but don’t discount the skill in which they are made. A bad movie is one that may be badly made, or may be badly executed.
Look at the skill which Irreversible and stand alone were made in, what’s considered worse is a matter of personal taste. I happen to think Irreversible is one of the best movies I’ve ever seen, but not because it’s pleasant to see.
I nominate the Funny Games remake to the hall of shame.
Withnail
Plan 9 From Outer Space and Troll 2 are actually two of the BEST movies ever made.