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Worst films you have ever seen

technicolornightmare

over 4 years ago

Will add more to the list a bit later.

15. “The Blair Witch Project 2: Book of Shadows” (Joe Berlinger, 2000)
14. “Teenage Caveman” (Larry Clark, 2001)
13. “Eurotrip” (Jeff Schaffer, 2004)
12. “Eddie Murphy Raw” (Robert Townsend, 1987)
11. “The Wizard of Gore” (Herschell Gordon Lewis, 1968)
10. “Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning” (Danny Steinmann, 1985)
9. “City of the Living Dead” (Lucio Fulci, 1980)
8. “Black Devil Doll From Hell” (Chester Novell Turner, 1984)
7. “Tales From the Quadead Zone” (Chester Novell Turner, 1987)
6. “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation” (Kim Henkel, 1994)
5. “Zack and Miri Make a Porno” aka. “Cock and Pussy Make a Piece of Shit” (Kevin Smith, 2008)
4. “Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo” (Mike Bigelow, 2005)
3. “Epic Movie” (Aaron Shitzer & David Fuckberg, 2007)
2. “Freddy Got Fingered” (Tom Green, 2001)

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1. “Nekromantik” (Jörg Buttcancer, 1987)

___ _____

over 4 years ago

Andrew

about 3 years ago

200 American by far.

Jamie Mattick

about 3 years ago

last days, Gus Van Sant. Bela Tarr does slow cinema well, this man should stay away.

Dennis Brian

about 3 years ago

Lachlan Foley

has named at least 4 films that I love

different strokes I guess

johnny

about 3 years ago

freddie got fingered was hilarious.

and i really liked last days the second time around. but anyway…

of course you could list thousands of horribly made horror movies, that’s just obvious. i think the worst movie ever made in terms of how much money it made/cost and all the awards would be titanic. it’s like a bad made for tv movie.

Tom Cavende​r

about 3 years ago

“Manos: Hands of Fate”
“Ace Ventura: Pet Detective” (makes the worst Jerry Lewis comedy look like Preston Sturges)
“Mikey” (murderous 9 year old randomly kills people)
“Death of a Gunfighter” (should’ve been called “No-Doz for the Audience”)
“Glen or Glenda” (yes, it’s a worse movie than “Plan 9”)
“Myra Breckinridge”

johnny

about 3 years ago

glen or glenda is awesome too.

Zachary Stahlma​n

about 3 years ago

The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day
Any Kevin Smith Movie(Except for Chasing Amy)
Gamer
Werewolf
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Saw V & VI
Garden State
Pearl Harbor
The Hills Have Eyes II
Crank 2:High Voltage
300
Dawn of the Dead(2004)
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre(2003)
Friday The 13th(2009)
Black Christmas(2006)

.K.

about 3 years ago

I try to stay away from bad movies. But the worst I’ve seen is probably The Master of Disguise.

deckard croix

about 3 years ago

Valkyrie.

Dr. Szell

about 3 years ago

City of Angels. Meg Ryan plays a cardiac surgeon.

-VAHID-

about 3 years ago

Twilight:new moon

Tom Cavende​r

about 3 years ago

Kjartan – besides how awful it was, what amazed me about “Master of Disguise” was that the DVD release had a director’s commentary.

Geronim​o

about 3 years ago

Slumdog Millionaire, by far the worst I’ve seen in years…

thelady​assassi​n

about 3 years ago

“Where in the World is Osama bin Laden?” is one of the worst films (documentary- if it can even be called that) I have ever seen. In fact, I can’t think of anything I’d rather not watch (even Sweet Movie)

I fucking hoped his wife miscarried so the kid wouldn’t be raised anywhere near him. No such luck but there’s always SIDS

Second the Transformers Revenge of the Fallen call. Terrible – much more so than the first one. Also, despite being a fan of Scorsese, I thought The Departed was just plain ugly.

Bostonl​una

about 3 years ago

The appropriately named Blow (2001 Ted Demme).

@cooler brother- People from Boston sound like idiots in The Departed- and I’m from there.

vladdyt​rout

about 3 years ago

Embryo, a 1970s horror flick starring Rock Hudson.

Tim Burton’s remake of Planet of the Apes. So much money spent on creating such a mind-numbing, pointless movie.

Django

about 3 years ago

I can’t honestly say its the worst picture I have ever seen but certainly the worst one I have seen recently: I sat through Flyboys (2006) last night at a family function and man, it was painful. The overall visual style was OK, if very pedestrian, but the script was beyond bad and the CG effects stuck out like a sore thumb. It was so bad that I went home and watched another bad movie The Blue Max (1966) which seemed like Citizen Caine by comparison.

I’ll say this for The Blue Max, it is much closer to being grounded in something resembling historical accuracy and has some of the finest aerial cinematography since Hell’s Angels (1930) and a pretty dang great score. Flyboys has neither and did I mention some of the acting was lousy too.

Colin Morgan

about 3 years ago

A pretty typical list:

Howard the Duck
Manos: The Hands of Fate (English translation? Hands: The Hands of Fate)
Plan 9 From Outer Space
Epic Movie
Pearl Harbor

Paul Johnson

about 3 years ago

Pretty typical, and pretty wrong (i.e. I respectfully disagree)
Maybe it helps to have been an easy to please six year old whose brain rotted away from a combination of too much junk food and reruns of Mr. Belvedere, but I always rather liked Howard the Duck.

And I always thought Manos: the Hands of Fate played a bit like a Tarkovsky movie, if Tarkovsky had a lobotomy and then was given $14.54 to make a movie, and then gave the results to a blind four year old to edit. You know, all those wonderful long takes of the Texas hinderlands from a station wagon window. I see the seeds of Solaris there, and I’m only 9/10ths kidding.

As an aficionado of low budget psychotronica, I must insist Plan 9 isn’t that bad. It’s ridiculous, sure, but at least it moves well (compare to something by Jerry Warren) and it’s rather well-lit, not something you can say about a lot of movies made on Plan 9’s budget. And I consider the line “You people of Earth are idiots” to be among the finest pieces of philosophical wisdom of the 20th century.

I’ve spared myself Epic Movie and Pearl Harbor, so I can’t comment.

So off the top of my head (i.e. the movies I see I’ve rated a 1 at Imdb, selections from letters A -L) the real answers are:

A Beautiful Mind, an experimental movie made by Richie Cunningham (he killed Opie Taylor, a director of fine, unpretentious comedies like Splash and Night Shift, in late ’99 and cruelly took his identity) that tested the hypothesis that it was possible to make Jennifer Connelly seem completely uninteresting. And the bastard pulled it off, and for that he got an Oscar.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream (1999) Shakespearean tripe, the nastiest kind. The thought of the things Ally McBeal did to the Bard’s immortal lines haunts me to this day.

A Separate Peace- The worst novel ever assigned in Freshman English transformed into a major motion picture. Just to viscerally illustrate how stupid the novel is, I guess.

A Time to Kill – Not just stupid, manipulative too. It’s a multi-tasker.

Austin Powers in Goldmember – Why would you continue to beat a horse not only after it’s long dead, but after its bones have crumbled into dust and you’re just pounding gravel? Only Mike Myers and his accountant know for sure.

Change of Habit – Elvis Presley, M.D., cures autism, tempts Mary Taylor Moore into eternal damnation, and sings “Rubberneckin.’” And yet, the movie sucks.

Creepshow III – Oh dear lord. Oh, sweet jesus. No, no, no. Quit it. Quit it now. Please. Oh, it hurts. It hurts bad. Real bad. Lordy. Lordy. Lordy. Jesus wept.

Disclosure – A stand-in for the complete oeuvre of Barry Levinson, excepting Diner.

Fair Game – I’m still shocked that this movie about the Russian mafia starring Cindy Crawford and William Baldwin turned out to be really, really awful. Shocked, I tell you.

Godspell – The poor man’s Jesus Christ Superstar (which was no Calloway Went Thataway itself) reminds me of something James Agee said in response to the wave of idiotic biblical epics that began pouring out of studios in the late 1940s, namely that some compassionate agnostic needs to form a Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to God to protest films like this.

Jack – Maybe the single worst movie made by a great director. And keep in mind, this is even worse than The Cotton Club, The Godfather III or Gardens of Stone.

Kidco – A kid friendly ode to joys of comsumer whoredom. Only in the 80s. And maybe the 90s. And almost certainly the 00s. But now I’m pretty sure we’ve turned the page of this crap. I mean, if not, what good is voting anyway.

Jingle All the Way – see Kidco.

Lethal Weapon 4 – Theoretically, I like stupid. Theoretically, I can even admire crassness. As long as the movie also has a little smarts and style, which this ain’t got.

Sue Denim

over 2 years ago

Constantine.
I mean – what the fuck was that?? Matrix must be even greater than I thought when it so expertly hid Reeves’ awful awful acting. And the script! “I need to use THE CHAIR!” omg. So so so bad. What was Tilda Swinton doing in it anyway? Certainly not saving the film…beyond good and evil.
The only film coming close to that abomination is “Ghost Rider” – still the only time I left the cinema halfway through the film.

Miasma

over 2 years ago

adrian628

over 2 years ago

i am curious yellow
(i have no plans to watch the blue version)

FailedI​mitator

over 2 years ago

@Miasma Spot on about November. It wasn’t only bad, but I found it really offensive; even so much so because I’d just watched Stay the previous night. Stay was pretty bad too.

FailedI​mitator

over 2 years ago

And I agree with Paul, I actually like Plan 9…

Edwin N

over 2 years ago

Schindler’s List

Emotional manipulation, falsified historical events, awful tendency to transform an atrocious business-man into a heroic figure, recycled music to instore tear-jerking in cinemas.

Marcus WP

over 2 years ago

lol @ eddie murphy raw being among that list

Tom

over 2 years ago

Wildfire: The Arabian Heart