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Threske: Filmography

OM NAMAH SHIVAYA. OM NAMAH SHIVAYA. OM NAMAH SHIVAYA. OM NAMAH SHIVAYA.

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
23 Feb 13
Wicked City

One word: mouthgina. ★★★★

Wicked City

I went into this expecting an unpretentious, silly romp - one of those comedies that knows it's dumb and cliched and delivers consistent laughs (e.g. "Sex Drive") - but as much as I dig Corddry and Cusack, this is an unforgivably, savagely, unremittingly shitty movie. It makes knuckle-dragging, lowbrow, by-the-numbers bromedies seem complex and sophisticated, and didn't elicit so much as a chuckle. ★★, generously.

Hot Tub Time Machine

"John, you know when you're little, you have more endurance than God is ever to grant you again? Children are man at his strongest; they abide."

The Night of the Hunter

Ultimately ineffectual plot exposition is forgivable when framed with some of the most distinctive, evocative, and sublimely atmospheric aural and visual aesthetics I've ever seen. Utterly alive with dreamlike, sterile alien menace, like a dimly-recalled nightmare, Beyond The Black Rainbow is an icy plexiglass, steel, fluorescent and analogue synth confluence of Tarkovsky, Lynch, THX 1138, Ridley Scott, et al. ★★★★

Beyond the Black Rainbow
Luca Bottazzi and Cbarky99 like this

08 Dec 12
May

"I TOLD YOU TO FACE THE GODDAMNED WALL."

May

Gratuitous CGI escapism at its finest. ★★★★

The Adventures of Tintin
04 Nov 12
Army of Darkness

Gimme some sugar, baby.

Army of Darkness

One of the most fun and original movies made in recent years. That something this unorthodox and outright wacky not only survived a few pitch meetings but was greenlit, produced and ultimately saw wide theatrical release is nothing short of miraculous. Know as little about it as possible going in and let the incredulous laughter flow. ★★★★

The Cabin in the Woods
19 Oct 12
Mean Girls

I love Tina Fey, but this is a real piece of shit.

Mean Girls
30 Sep 12
Prometheus

I'm puzzled as to how this was so widely dismissed as mediocre and even poor. Cheese was sprinkled fairly liberally throughout, especially in the third act; there're plenty of glaring inconsistencies in era technology; just as numerous are the B horror film caliber "Why-would-they-do-that"s - but I genuinely enjoyed most of it. I'll not remark on its iteration of the Alien cosmology - I have my own "real" Xenomorph

Prometheus
  • Picture of Threske

    Threske

    30Sep12

    universe, an isolated and idiosyncratic mythos cherry-picked from the original film, Giger's seminal vision, and some of the Dark Horse comics canon, and I can't ever realistically expect any subsequent films to do it justice - suffice it, I didn't care for it. Whatever treatment of the Engineers I would've liked to see would be sparse. The Xenomorphs must definitively remain monolithic question marks; to deal in causal, chronological and original terms of their being is to bleed them of the profound menace of the unknown -- the films are called Alien; the Xenomorphs: Alien. Giving too much of a how, why, and especially a who to them defeats the purpose utterly. That said - taken apart from the canonical arc of Alien proper, Prometheus is far from bad.

18 Sep 12
Children of Men

Easily one of the most overrated sci-fi films of the 00s. By no means a bad film, but far from the prescient, evocative, hyper-pertinent vision of New Dystopia it's inexplicably misremembered as being. ★★★ for its justly-praised production value.

Children of Men
daniel v likes this

18 Sep 12
Blast from the Past

"Thank my lucky stars, a negro!"

Blast from the Past
18 Sep 12
Squirm

Mike Nelson, Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot give this the sendup it shamelessly earns. Highly recommended MST3K episode.

Squirm
  • Picture of Sheldon No

    Sheldon No

    22Jan13

    Actually, this film really is underrated. People treat this film as though the filmmakers were the Tarantinos of the 70's. For being so modestly made, it's a wonderful and outstanding piece of moody horror. But it is in fact a modest film. The way people attack it, again you'd believe the director was the biggest asshole on the planet who hated the audience.

Ay yo, cuz', you hella cliched 'n' shit, ya 'eard? Like, schkraight up, embarrassingly hackneyed stereotype on two feets, dogg. F'real: you a coarse, low-minded caricature; the popalarity y'all's buffoonery garners is symptomatic of a larger cultural devolution; another deafening horn heralding the abasement of our species. Y'all be, like, black Jersey Shore. Real talk, son.

Martin Lawrence: You So Crazy
16 Sep 12
Rocky

I'm perfectly comfy both with having never seen this and having zero desire to do anything about it. The irradiated cultural fallout of its influence proves its insipidity. Is there such a thing as a training montage that /doesn't/ involving shadowboxing while running up municipal building steps in sweatpants, post-Avildsen? I like drooling, lobotomized blockbusters as much as the next guy, but this reeks of L.C.D.

Rocky

The last thing a metal drummer should be asked to do is act. And yet, he outperforms Clive Owen. This's *that* bad.

Hemingway & Gellhorn
26 May 12
Men in Black III

I wanna see this solely for Brolin's Tommy Lee Jones

Men in Black III
Qiydaar Foster likes this

14 Apr 12
Moneyball

If you ever wondered what it'd be like to watch Brad Pitt hastily eating for two hours, this's the movie for you

Moneyball
Daniela likes this

Is there a better living American actor?

Cast Member Still
Kirby and my nigga totoro like this

  • Picture of Roscoe

    Roscoe

    12Sep12

    Yes. Several. Hundreds.

  • Picture of my nigga totoro

    my nigga totoro

    16Sep12

    Feel free to list them Roscoe.

  • Picture of Roscoe

    Roscoe

    16Sep12

    Sean Penn, Kevin Kline, Paul Giamatti, Hal Holbrook, Robert Duvall, Al Pacino, Robert Duvall, Michael Shannon, Martin Sheen, Brian Dennehy, Sissy Spacek, Julianne Moore, Holly Hunter, John Goodman, James Earl Jones, Denzel Washington, Robert Downey Jr., Lawrence Fishburne, Jeffrey Wright, Justin Kirk, Ron Liebman, Samuel L. Jackson, Sally Field, the list goes on and on and on, any number of of living American actors who are far better than P.S. Hoffman. I've only scratched the surface here.

  • Picture of Roscoe

    Roscoe

    16Sep12

    And I didn't even mention Robert De Niro, Jessica Lange, Dustin Hoffman, Audra McDonald...

  • Picture of Threske

    Threske

    17Sep12

    A few of them are his peers (notably Penn, Duvall, Pacino), and several are very good (Downey, Hoffman, Sheen, DeNiro, Spacek), but none you listed excel him (nevermind "are far better"), several are mediocre, and a few even outright poor. The inclusion of Kirk, McDonald, and Kline are confusing, for while they're by no means bad, they haven't delivered any convincing performances. But Lawrence Fishburne? James Earl Jones, Sally Field? Paul Giamatti and Samuel Jackson!? I mean, I /enjoy/ watching a few of those actors, but you're either joking, or buying melodramatic histrionics as genuine, cathartic and evocative acting.

  • Picture of Roscoe

    Roscoe

    18Sep12

    Looks like we disagree. I've yet to see anything genuine, cathartic or evocative from P.S. Hoffman. He's by no means Keanu-level bad, but he's yet to deliver a really convincing performance to match the best of Al Pacino or Robert Duvall).. In calling him America's finest living actor, you're either joking, or buyikng melodramatic histrionics as genuine, cathartic and evocative acting yourself. Opinions differ all over the place. Sorry to hijack your posting, though.

  • Picture of (☯)

    (☯)

    27Jan13

    lol @ sally field > phil hoffman. good joke, bro.

  • Picture of T. J. Mesen

    T. J. Mesen

    13May13

    Just one name: Joaquin Phoenix

  • Picture of Threske

    Threske

    14May13

    naw dogg

This shouldn't work on so many levels - almost uniformly horrible acting, a few laughably cheesy moments - but it does. The post-processing on the tapes (static, noise, roll, color deformation) is almost the star in itself, and helps to create some of the most unique and genuinely creepy atmosphere in anything I've seen. I hate the "horror" genre, categorically, but this is a hugely underappreciated gem.

The Poughkeepsie Tapes
Steve Pulaski likes this

29 Jan 12
Bad Influence

Greg Proops was right on the money about this one.

Bad Influence

Technically exquisite, and totally mediocre in every other way. An inexplicable late-game "sequel" undeserving of its ancestor. I almost couldn't keep a straight face with Pam Adlon as Leila in the English dub.

Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust

♪ ♫ Do you ever take drugs so that you can have sex without crying, yeah-yeah! ♫ ♪

Sarah Silverman: Jesus Is Magic
Ryan Clark likes this

21 Dec 11
Couples Retreat

Wow, what a turd.

Couples Retreat
Samantha Kate and Max like this

25 Sep 11
Vernon, Florida

He doublegobbled.

Vernon, Florida
WhatsUpWill likes this

"EGO SUM QUI INTUS HABITAT!" ...Latin for "I can't believe I'm in this piece of shit." ★★

The Exorcism of Emily Rose
Kid Sisyphus likes this

15 Sep 11
Yes Man

Handily one of 2008's shittiest.

Yes Man
15 Sep 11
Hook

Oh THERE you are, Peter!

Hook
a Smith and 2 others like this

jamshid, Sara Crewe

  • Picture of Roscoe

    Roscoe

    21Mar12

    That's actually one of the best moments in this otherwise excruciating film.

15 Sep 11
Jurassic Park

Life, uh, uh, FINDS a WAY.

Jurassic Park