Pure, Altmanesque brilliance. Mark Wahlberg expertly leads a huge cast, and it a big bright fucking star.

A fucking brilliant, twisty, perfectly acted neo-noir from Anderson.

Charming, funny, and more than a little sad, The Good Girl features both Jennifer Aniston (in a career-best) and an excellent, scene-stealing Zooey Deschanel.

Extremely entertaining, if unwieldy adaptation of a great comic. Gene Hackman and Christopher Reeve are excellent, but Margot Kidder is kind of awful.

Bigelow overcomes James Cameron's frankly terrible script and makes a damned good movies, with three great performances from Ralph Fiennes, Angela Bassett, and Juliette Lewis.

An unspeakably godawful film. Cameron manages even to make Leo, Kate, Kathy Bates, and Victor Garber look talentless with his terrible dialogue.

A poorly acted, obnoxiously edited, unfocused, pretentious French piece of shit that justifies its ridiculous running time and hyper-stylized dialogue with random close-ups of the ever-lovely Catherine Deneuve.

An honest (and a little sad) view at the life and work of Joan Rivers.

An incredibly poorly-written noir that just shows that Dassin was incredibly overrated.

An incredibly annoying film that goes nowhere, does nothing, failed to capture my attention, and made Gena Rowlands look talentless.

A mediocre if entertaining thriller, with some stilted writing. Jason Statham makes the most of it, though.

The most poignant, heartbreakingly sad film of the year. Which is not a criticism - it's a wonderfully realized character study with two of the most naturalistic performances of the year.

A beautiful and sweet film, one of Mike Leigh's best.

A Godard movie about film as only Godard could do it.

While it's definitely a January movie, No Strings Attached is a funny and silly little romcom with great supporting help.

A terribly manipulative whiny melodrama. Oh, and Golden Globes/everyone who thought Tobey Maguire was good? He wasn't.

I liked it aesthetically, and all the villains were excellent, but Michael Keaton is still dead wrong for Batman, and its timing and sprawl should've been kept in check.

A searing, if sometimes unclear, look at adultery and relationships. Uniformly Oscar-worthy, though. Come for the A-listers, stay for the conversation between Clive Owen and Julia Roberts on Jude Law's come.

An exceptionally silly piece of self-conscious sci-fi schlock, Mars Attacks! is an unfairly maligned work in the Burton canon.

Aside from a few cool set-pieces, it's kind of just a disposable cops-vs.-crooks thriller.

Fantastically well-acted. If only it didn't feel like a TV movie…

A very pretty, well-acted film that is essentially people walking for an hour forty-five. Walking.

Exactly what the genre needed, a funny as hell, badass kick to the nuts. It's slumming, but slumming of the best kind: where Gondry and Rogen realized they'd put out a ton of great stuff over the years, and just went for broke.

Plays like Night of the Living Dead meets Aliens meets The Daily show, by way of Tom Savini. Pure gory offensive excellence.

Certainly a difficult film to watch, but a gut-wrenching and maybe not beautiful, but necessary film.

All awesome, pulpy, campy fun from schlockmeister Sam Raimi. Miles better than Spider-Man (but not Spider-Man 2).

A beautiful and creepy telling of the now Disneyfied story.

An awesomely bad little sci-fi piece of schlock that kicks Michael Bay's ass all day, every day.

Such a brilliant satire. Broadcast News, eat your hear out.

So…I cared about none of the characters, but I still liked it. A little. Kinda.