A great big steaming pile of nonsense. I had the urge to air out my living room after watching this. They tried to go the Marvel movie route by trying to check off all the right boxes; good gender mix, check! ethnically diverse robots, check! mark wahlberg attempting humor, well it is what it is! Watch this while you fold your laundry, or better yet, when vacuuming.. you won't regret missing the dialogue.
This is probably the best in the franchise, which does not make it decent at all, but it was way more entertaining than I thought it would be. It gets so ridiculous and stupid that you simply lose all perspective and critical thinking, to the point where the crap you are watching actually makes sense. I really have no clue how or why these pieces of shit keep getting made, but all in all this could've been worse.
The final bayformers(& i'm thinking he has been given more control each time)is such a mad, cuckoo auterist achievement it commands a reexamination of his previous work.It's thoroughly unrelenting, cameras on top of cameras on cranes and gliders - 4 movies of backstory&characters to play with- Bay goes supernova, transforming into Jules Verne and sending Whalberg- his greatest character, to the sea and to the sky.▽
Any movie franchise that relies on the enthusiasm of elementary schoolers invariably has a limited shelf life. It's just a shame that audience excitement for the "Transformers" property had to dwindle right as director Michael Bay delivered his most discursive, auteurist, and (arguably) most technically impressive entry in the series. The bastard son of Scott, Cameron, and Spielberg has come home to roost.
Kade Yeager. Dark Age battles still rife with explosions. Editing tha- scene's can't ev- stutter skipping through an entirely new plot every ten minutes, replete with new dense exposition. Why are these movies so complicated? Why so much story, when people see them in spite of the mythos? Why does every action require twelve cuts? Can Mark no longer sit down in a single take? A useful reset to the baseline of taste.
LANDFILL: THE MOVIE! After two decent entries, Bay falters on his final entry in the franchise. There's a lot going on here, most of it moving at a barely comprehensible pace. The swirling junk/vampire planet final set piece doesn't add any clarity. The movie just kind of ends out of obligation rather than from a real resolution. Pretty mediocre—even Hopkins can't help. Also, ROUGE ONE called and it wants K-2SO back.
Bay never gone as berserk as this. It's THE DA VINCI CODE, KING ARTHUR, TRANSFORMERS, ARMAGEDDON, ARRIVAL, MELANCHOLIA, CHAPPIE, BATTLESHIP, CRIMSON TIDE, STAR WARS, A DOCUMENTARY WITH ANTHONY HOPKINS AS A NARRATOR, AN ADAM SANDLER COMEDY WITH JOHHN TURTURRO AS A SUPPORTING ACTOR, THE AVENGERS (THE BRITISH SPY ONE, NOT THE SUPERHERO ORGY ONE), all rolled into one.