THE TREE OF LIFE:
Multiple Intelligences: Expose Your Kids!
Artistic Intelligence (as opposed to Bodily/Kinesthetic)
Later, the latter son here plays a guitar piece, while his father hears him and accompanies him on piano. It is in this moment they bond, and father lets him use his natural talent.
Practical #2: Quality Time (Connecting with your Child)/Don’t sweat the small stuff, HAVE FUN!
In this scene, EXASPERATION comes out against the father, who, when around, keeps his sons in line about the rules- one of them being not to slam the front door.
More in the film:
Subjugation (mother’s behavior with father)
Insufficient Self-Control (Jack breaking windows with friends, shooting brother with bb gun)
Genuine apology/reconciliation (Jack’s apology to his brother after shooting him, and his brother’s forgiveness)
Punitiveness (father’s consistent behavior- his punishing of Jack for slamming front door perhaps?)
RACHEL GETTING MARRIED:
KIM HAS BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER
Kim is very insecure and hides her defectiveness in exposing other’s flaws and poor decisions. Socially, the majority of these flaws and poor decisions become more evident in herself than others when she does this.
Kim turns every outreached hand, compliment, or observation into a negative line of though, or cutting remark/retort. She does this to everyone around her- family included.
Kim often shines a light on herself, with what could be akin to approval-seeking; however, she does not want approval so much as attention, because there’s no way she can’t expect others to think she’s funny or unoffensive because the purpose of this behavior is a defense mechanism. She wishes her every thought and opinion to be heard, and though rarely heeded, heard they often are.
Schema: INSUFFICIENT SELF-CONTROL
Kim must light up a cigarette at all times- she has no concept of appropriate or inappropriate timing. She makes allusions to her drug use, since she is a recovering addict just released from rehab for her sister’s wedding. She is also behaves promiscuously, having sex with one of the wedding guests- someone she doesn’t even know.
Kim’s CHILD SIDE has been totally shut-out, completely buried. Everything she does acts as a wall preventing others from coming in. Although, later in the film, there is hope for reconciliation within the family…
A MIGHTY WIND:
High Potential for I Choose Us Program!
Schemas: EMOTIONAL INHIBITION/APPROVAL-SEEKING/EMOTIONAL DEPRIVATION/etc.
(Mostly stemming from DISCONNECTION AND REJECTION)
1) 0:00-1:41: Context set-up
2) 1:41-2:46: Mitch’s emotional barriers (EMOTIONAL INHIBITION) show that his CHILD SIDE is very diminished between himself and others, even Mickey.
3) 2:26-3:09: Mickey explains that she was fighting with Mickey more and more often towards the end of their career together.
4) 3:09-3:48: Mitch & Mickey’s recording engineer for their last record explains how they broke up as a music duo. Mitch “snaps.”
5) 3:48-4:17: Mitch’s solo career in music points to his depression (EMOTIONAL DEPRIVATION), which in turn reveals him to be sad and angry about the break up.
6) 4:17-4:47: Mitch’s therapist explains he was very angry, which was “unhealthy for all of us-” that he should have stayed in treatment longer.
7) 8:53-9:42: Mitch explains significance of a red rose given to him by Mikey, after he was beat up and hospitalized for challenging a heckler at one of Mickey’s gigs- which was the first time he saw her.
8) 9:42-: Mitch explains how he first started working with Mickey. Mickey followed Mitch, because- as she says- he was strong and knew what he wanted. She “went along for the ride.”
1) 0:00-1:10: Irving Steinbloom’s son Jonathan, who’s organizing the event, meets with Mitch to help him prepare for the show. Mitch won’t leave his hotel room. Mitch says, “there’s a deception here: the audience, they’re expecting to see a man who no longer exists.” This response stems from NEGATIVITY/PESSIMISM and a sense of FAILURE.
[Sounds form sexual intercourse occur during conversation- dialogue interrupted.]
[DELETED SCENE] 2) 3:18-4:10: Mitch and Mickey bond for a moment rehearsing for the reunion, then avoid embracing that it was bonding.
3) 4:10-5:06: “The Phenomenon of That Kiss” explained.
4) 5:06-6:25: Mitch and Mickey rehearse again, this time the song they famously kissed to. This time, they don’t kiss but instead pause awkwardly.
5) 7:38-8:18: Mitch leaves a few hours before his performance with Mickey to “go outside and get some air.” Mickey is concerned about him. Perhaps he is stressed?
6) 8:31-8:47: Mitch is far from the building, appearing as if he is wandering aimlessly.
7) 9:47-10:13: Mitch arrives with a rose as Jonathan and Mickey argue, who wants to go home. He is 5 minutes late for their live set. The rose symbolizes the one bought for him by Mickey many years back, before they started playing together.
1) 0:00-1:35: We learn of Mitch’s adoration for Mickey only came out on the page; as she introduces their set, she pulls out a poem containing the first poem he ever wrote her. It is undeniably a poem of love. Mitch, in his EMOTIONAL INHIBITION remarks, “I just wanted a drink of water”
2) 4:48-7:35: When Mitch and Mickey perform “Kiss At The End of a Rainbow,” they pause for a long time, but then they kiss. The kiss is genuine, but to my belief is one less of any sexual desire, but more representing an honest healing of all their trials and tribulations together.
ATMOSPHERE: THE LAST TO SAY (MUSIC VIDEO)
Schema: MISTRUST/ABUSE (Physical)/ENMESHMENT/SUBJUGATION
I can go on and on about why I love this video so much, but I think it directly illustrates the way abuse works; how it is witnessed by the child, and how in many cases, the child repeats these actions in one form or another- often to their loved ones. And yet, those abused, often, don’t walk away so easily; they want to make their partners and/or family happy, and in their subjugation they stick around.
FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS
Schema: PUNITIVENESS/MISTRUST/ABUSE (Physical)/UNRELENTING STANDARDS
Self-explanatory. During the season’s first day of practice, Don fumbles the ball during a play, prompting his father Charlie to step onto the field unwarranted. He throws his son to the ground, asking why he can’t keep a grip on the ball. Charlie even attempts to attack another player defending Don before finally leaving the field.
REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE:
Coping Style: OVERCOMPENSATING+COUNTER-ATTACKER
Jim OVERCOMPENSATES because his personal definition of being a man is to heed and return all confrontation and challenge affirmatively- God forbid he be called a “chicken.” He engages in a fight with Buzz as he believes he is defending his honor. Jim strives to demonstrate his very opposite coping style of his father- an AVOIDANT/SURRENDERED father who, in his eyes, is weak, domineered by his mother who is clearly a OVER-COMPENSATOR/COUNTER-ATTACKER.
Coping Style: OVERCOMPENSATING+COUNTER-ATTACKER
Jim goes so far as to participate in a “chickie run” with Buzz, the boy he fought with before. This is an extremely dangerous game involving 2 people each racing a car towards a cliff. The last to jump out of the car is the loser, or the “chicken.” Buzz gets killed in the chickie run because his jacket gets caught on the door before he can jump.
Coping Styles: AVOIDANT/OVER-COMPENSATING+SURRENDERED
Schemas: INSUFFICIENT SELF-CONTROL/SUBJUGATION/IMPAIRED AUTONOMY+PERFORMANCE
Other: REASONABLE LIMITS, CONSEQUENCES
Clip disabled for embedding. CLICK LINK TO WATCH: James Dean-Rebel Without A Cause scene with parents
Here, we see Jim arguing with his parents. His father avoids giving direct advice to Jim because he is AVOIDANT. Jim wants to do what is right: he want to turn himself in and confess the truth of what happened at the chickie run, but his parents want to protect him from these CONSEQUENCES and continue to shelter him. Jim desires to see his father to stand up for him in disagreement towards mother’s decision to move homes again. His father fails to do so, because of his SUBJUGATION when interacting with his wife (Jim and his parents move every time Jim gets in trouble; his inability to make friends and have consistency causes much EXASPERATION). This is likely the kind of parenting they exhibit that has caused his high level of INSUFFICIENT SELF-CONTROL. Jim’s IMPAIRED AUTONOMY/PERFORMANCE becomes clear and apparent, yet his parents set no REASONABLE LIMITS- something he also wants desperately.
Schemas: EMOTIONAL DEPRIVATION/DEFECTIVENESS
Coping Styles: OVERCOMPENSATOR+COUNTER-ATTACKER/AVOIDER
Clip disabled for embedding. CLICK LINK TO WATCH: Rebel without a Cause “Live it Up”
We already know that Jim is an OVERCOMPENSATOR in the face of confrontation, but in typical conversation he is much more an AVOIDER. Judy is an avoider all-around: she never spoke up around Buzz, even when Jim addressed her before he engaged in the knife fight with Buzz. Judy is also EMOTIONALLY DEPRIVED/DEFECTIVE. Earlier in the film, we see her home life: how her father slaps her for kissing him on the lips and cheek. She feels totally uncared for by men and does not receive the affection she desires. Once Buzz dies, she does not show signs of overwhelming emotion, but soon clings to Jim for the rest of the film. When he kisses her forehead, she is smitten, or so she thinks. As they sit on the hood of his car, Jim says, “I know one thing: I’m not going back in that zoo.” To which she replies, “I’m never going back.” They are both referring to their home life. Jim and Judy bond over their desire to be away from civilization, and their mutual disdain for their parental interaction- so Jim invites her to an abandoned mansion. Judy agrees, and it is clear they both are looking to find a safe haven, a place to relate with each other and be affectionate without fear of judgment (SOCIAL ISOLATION).
THANK YOUR FOR SMOKING:
Using logical fallacies, a form of counter-attacking, Nick Naylor defends ‘Big Tobacco,’ who he serves as the chief spokesperson for. While this is his job and not necessarily emotionally influenced, his behavior shines a light on the verbal behavior of counter-attacking and over-compensating. This is very evident here:
…and here, in the final scene:
Also, in the first clip, we see Nick Naylor visit his son at school to tell the class what he does for a living. What can be a case of ENTITLEMENT and INSUFFICIENT SELF-CONTROL has him deliver a pro-cigarette message even to the kids in the classroom.Read less