Stunningly awful and misguided messes like these do not come around so often so they can almost sustain a bizarre fascination (why are the performances so mannered and stilted? is it possible for a couple to have less chemistry on screen? how is it possible for a director to go from The Lives of Others to this?).
Like any imitation, it contains traces of the thing it is trying to imitate (lest it completely fail to register as an imitation); in this case it offers a modern take on the kinds of glamourous thrillers in the mode of Hitchcock's TO CATCH A THIEF or Donen's CHARADE. But it's dull, by the numbers, and lacks the chemistry it needs to sell this particular brand of entertainment.
It seemed as though during the making they thought of everything except the ending, so they decided to make up VERY unrealistic excuses at the end to fit the pieces. It's not the type of movie that surprises you the first time and then makes you go "Oh! That totally makes sense now" the second. The more you watch it, the more questions it generates. Not surprising, to say the least.
The story is rife with banality and predictability while trying to pass itself off as Charade. Johnny Depp continues his trek of contrived weirdness and goofiness while the movie forces Angelina Jolie's deflating hotness and menacing thinness. I'm not sure which was more disappointing -- the movie itself or the fact that I pissed away more than an hour and a half of my life watching it...